I kissed waiting goodbye

Waiting…

There could be two scenarios when one is waiting for someone:

1. Like in the Lake House movie, no matter how long it has taken, Alex (Keanu Reeves) came for Kate (Sandra Bullock) and the story ended with a much awaited liplock of the two lovers.
2. Like the in the play Waiting for Godot, two friends have been waiting for a man named Godot from the beginning until the ending of the play, unfortunately, Godot did not show up, which in my opinion- the worst way to end a play.

The worst part of waiting is waiting for something that will never come. It is the same thing when one is in love with someone and waiting to be loved back, but the love remains unreciprocated despite the long wait… It is worst because it will never be over until someone gives up and wait no more for a love to be returned back… and just like a lost fight, I’m throwing the white flag, not because I’m a loser, but because I’m a human with enough dignity to accept defeat.

Since last year, I have been in loved with this chef, but unfortunately he had chosen to love another lady despite my efforts to win his heart.
It was so painful, but I decided to move on. Then by chance, he was single again. I shouldn’t have been tempted, I shouldn’t have contacted him again, I shouldn’t have met him again, I shouldn’t have kissed him, but I did.

Yes, I was stupid to even think that there would be another chance, but the irony of it, there wasn’t even a chance even before and perhaps there would never be in the future, yet I was so blinded by my emotion, so even there was no hope, I still hoped and I waited and told him that I loved him.

The last message I got from him was telling me that he was good after I asked him how he was in which he replied in very few words, I had longer reply though, but he didn’t answer me back. So I waited for him to at least send me a message, but he never did and he would never unless I would send him a message first.

I guess he will never ever love me back no matter how long I will wait for him, no matter what I do for him, I’m just an insignificant other to him. So I’m not gonna wait for him again… I’m kissing waiting goodbye… And this time it’s real.

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